A Back Story

Several weeks ago, my local McDonald’s message board—under the golden arches—informed passersby that the McRib sandwich was coming back. Well, as of this writing, it is indeed back. But for how long? A friend of mine is literally triggered by the mere mention of the McRib's returns and sabbaticals. Always on que, he imparts the tale of the sandwich’s celebrated demise some years back, claiming that the franchise was sued when it was discovered that the McRib ingredients included tire rubber. Now, I don’t know if this is an urban legend or not, but I seem to recall controversy surrounding the McRib and what went into it. Even without tire rubber, the sandwich has a bizarre consistency that never fails to make you wonder how it came to be a McRib. In my opinion, it still is one of the tastier McDonald’s offerings when, of course, it is available. But that’s not saying much.

In fact, I passed by McDonald’s this morning on my way to Rite Aid, an over-priced drug store chain. Therein, I noticed that so much more of its merchandise was under lock and key, including all its beer, than when I last visited. There have been countless reported instances of blatant thievery in retail stores recently—and not just in San Francisco. It’s the sign of the times, I guess—lawlessness run amok. Anyway, as luck would have it, what I desired purchasing was behind locked doors. Rather than search for an employee with a key, my gut reaction was to just leave. I then spotted a security guard and asked him if he would do me the honor. He acted surprised at the request but nonetheless went in search of a key. Honestly, spontaneity in retail shopping is key. Things locked away will prevent theft, sure, but it will also lead to loss of sales.

Hey, Rite Aid, what gives? It’s November 5th and the store is not decorated for Christmas. The place still had Halloween merchandise on the shelves. I’ve been hearing about product shortages this holiday season, like artificial Christmas trees. Time will tell on that one. And what about the genuine articles—real trees—how will their supply be impacted by everything from droughts to floods to shipping snafus? It is, nevertheless, beginning to look a little like Christmas at least. The big Rockefeller Center tree has been selected. It’s coming from Maryland this year. And the Radio Music Hall Christmas Spectacular commences today. Last year there was no shows.

Hopefully, the worst of the pandemic is in the rear-view mirror. With any luck, some of the ugliness it wrought will go with it, too. Since COVID-19 reared its head, there has been a precipitous increase in revved up, engine-popping automobiles, motorcycles, and vehicles that don’t qualify as either passing through town. It’s part of that aforementioned lawlessness and overall stupidity. Idiots playing Speed Racer—a must-see cartoon for me as a kid—on residential back streets at all hours of the day. And the police turn a blind eye.

There’s also a lot of run-of-the-mill aggressive driving. Red lights mean accelerating at their turns. Crossing at the green without looking both ways is a matter of life and death in these parts. Yesterday, I had the light when a taxi driver made the left turn leading to a shopping mall. Hoping to pass by me before I got in his way, he floored the gas pedal. Stunned, I abruptly stopped and waved for the ass to pass. He sneered at me, like I was the guilty party for crossing at the green. The fact that I employ a cane mattered not at all. With the McRib sandwich a stone’s throw away from my adventures and misadventures, this is the world I call home.

(Photos from the personal collection of Nicholas Nigro)